Every time I hear the phrase, "Be Yourself", I'm confused to a high extent. Because then I am forced to ask myself, Who am I? What exactly does that phrase entail?
I was thinking about this just now, so I thought writing about it might help a little. It always seems to. So I think I'll jot down a bunch of things about me.
I am...
A writer
A poet
A girl who loves fashion
And also music
Someone who has a distinct yet familiar style
(Sometimes in this century I feel like I'm not being me or that I'm a fake since I wear stuff like skinny jeans and converse and it just so happens that it's the style, but that's really just because it's in style that I found out about all of it and it really is me because every time I see stuff like that it makes me feel really happy. And also I remember when things like flare jeans were in style and everyone was wearing them back when I was 14 and i hated those and was stuck wearing bootcut jeans cause I didn't know there was anything better, and then I found skinny jeans, and converse, and I felt tooooooooooootally me! so I guess that's all that really matters in the end =D )
Anyway, moving on.
A pessimist
A girl with extremely high standards
A Christian
A Perfectionist
Someone who sometimes suffers from violent mood swings
Willing to stand up for myself and what I feel
Someone who likes, looks forward to, and enjoys change
An extremely pensive person
Way too judgmental, but what really matters is that I change my mind
Way less indecisive than I used to be
Always guilty to no end
Too trusting of other people;I want to believe the best of everyone
Bad with stereo-typing people I don't even know
Strong, but weak
Not sunshine....maybe moonlight? Not sure...
Trying desperately to figure out who I am...DESPERATELY!
Ultimately, I can remember a time when I tried to be someone else. I wanted to dress like other people and not me. That's why I got into the "Aeropostale Trap". When I was thirteen, I had a crush on a guy and he wore aero shirts all the time, so did the other girls i was around, so i went to the store, saw the cute teeshirts, and 'thought' I liked them. I didn't. Only now, years later, do I regret the 10+ aero shirts hanging in my closet mocking me. But I am thankful I figured that out and embraced my urban/rocker/skater style. And let this be heard, I won't naively shop at Aeropostale ever again.
As I enter into the high school I've been dreaming of going to for the past year, I am committed to being the best ME that I can be. I won't look at other girls and think, "hey, since she's wearing that i should too!" No, I'm going to wear what I LIKE. And I'm going to be happier and healthier for it. Good luck to me Junior Year and on!
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